What is this?

Hi, this is Ocean.

A new identity. A new version myself.

Perhaps you may know me from my pseudonym “Gappiya” or if I am lucky (or unlucky depending on how you describe your luck), you might know me personally as “Tharindu”. Regardless of how we met, I am sure you must be confused right now. Why a new name? What is it all about?

My parents named me “Tharindu”. It means “Moon”. I don’t think I ever liked the name my parents gave me. I was born in Sri Lanka and “Tharindu” is a very common name over there. I never wanted to be “common”. I never will be anyway. For reasons, you will see shortly.

I grew up poor in a disturbed household. I got bullied in school. I was malnourished and suffered from chronic illness for most of my childhood years. Physically I was weak. However, I remember having a vibrant inner world. I’ve spent most of my time getting lost in conversations with my self. I don’t think I had any close friends. Surprisingly I was okay with it too. After years of soul searching and reasoning now, I know why.

I was unlucky most of my childhood but that changed when I immigrated to Australia. I met a very generous man who would help me to settle in Australia. A guy – unknown, who I met in a chat room when the internet just launched. I got lucky.

After many years of hardship as a young immigrant, Australia taught me many lessons. Then, I met a white girl who would open up a whole new world for me. I got lucky again. A new digital identity called “Gappiya” was born. Slowly I started to connect with my inner world. That lasted for a few years and, then I got unlucky.

A long-lasted relationship ended. I had to think of ways to survive on my own. Slowly my thoughts, values and purpose started to swift in a new direction.

I am calling this unknown entity the “Ocean Knighter”. My old self is dead. A new demon has claimed my soul. In this journal, I am letting him speak.

If are interested in this journey, you can be a part of the gang here.